Naughty or nice? I know that’s what you’re blog-spotting to see. You’re looking to the Rob blog for mystic 8-ball magic of Rob’s holiday goodness.
Was Rob naughty or nice?
“Ask again later…”
If I told you naughty/nice score, would it matter? It’s not like my credit score. Naughty/nice is not accurate enough to buy a house, car or velvet Elvis. Ask Jack’s giant; he didn’t care if the Englishman was naughty, nice, live or dead, there was still gonna be some bone-grindin’ bread-makin’ good times. It’s all about perspective.
Santa’s naughty or nice list might not be the same as the tooth fairy’s. After all the sugar cookies downed by the jolly fat boy, he probably doesn’t care too much about a bad bicuspid any more than the fairy concerns herself with a deviant dentist: so long as the job gets done.
The Rest of us are all the same way on a much broader scale. Some divorces are cut and dried, cheaters, for example, that’s rarely about divorce perspective.
“This isn’t what it looks like honey, I tripped and she caught me with her thighs…”
Yeah, stamp him with the naughty stamp of Santa. And sure, while she’s asleep you can ask the Tooth Fairy to chloroform her and give her the appropriate tramp stamp too.
Other things aren’t as easy as Christmas elves on coke. I know I spent more than my 12 days of Christmas trying to understand why MyEx left, but could never get past the six geese a’ laying without scrambling my egg in desperation.
That’s probably for the best, because, let’s face it, we can rummage through every door on our divorce Advent calendar and still not uncover anything more substantial than a chocolate blackface and a grand mal sugar seizure.
Unfortunately, many of us spend Christmas flogging ourselves with licorice whips of loneliness, running ‘round the tree train circles of “why.” From our perspective there is no Christmas morning answer: it’s all the eternal eve of unknowing.
We’d try everything from tarot to crystal balls if we thought we’d get an answer. Most of us don’t. The truth is that the crystal ball is nothing more than an overgrown snow globe and we’re just fooling ourselves if we expect an answer.
Yet just as the cut crystal ornament dangling from the tree, many divorces hold many faucets. The light refracts differently for both partners and nobody can see things from the other person’s prismatic glimpse. Sometimes we just have to accept that the other person’s “Whys” were enough to make them fall from the tree. Our only way through the holidays is to make peace and goodwill towards ourselves.
So shake your magic 8 money maker and maybe it will tell you whether Rob was naughter or nice. MyEx would have one answer, Maybe the Grunge Pixie has another. Was Rob naughty or nice? You read. You decide for yourselves. I’ve already made peace with my answers.
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