The heat snap broke!
It is heat snap right? I mean I know cold snaps, fever's break, geese bump, but does heat snap? I know it melts, but "Heat melt" doesn't sound right. Screw it, I'm sticking with "heat snap."
Anyway, yeah, it's in the 90s today! I can work with this. It's not servant's with palm fronds, fanning my whims, but I'll get by some how. I was slipping into heat delirium. You saw yesterday's blog, you know what I mean! A day dedicated to time? Dude! I think my brain fried.
Yes from the heat! It was there before thank you very much!
So now I've got my mind back and fluids sluicing through my veins, I'm back to normal(?). Back to life. My dad emailed me yesterday. He brought me to date on the family: my sister, my grandma, my mom. Then he asked about me, "How are you doing? Don't let the depression get to you. Keep busy. Get out there with people." The standard "chin up" stuff.
I emailed him back, told him I was fine. If I told Dad that, then I guess I am. I have to be. It was funny he mentioned the "Get out there" part. That's my tough area. I'm sure he knows it. It doesn't take a brain surgeon to see that. My family works for the County, and they knew it. Of course Dad has the advantage of insider information. He knows me, and he's been there himself. That's one of those things we don't talk about, either my dad or mom: their divorce. I've got old letters in a box somewhere, I think there's even lawyer paperwork My dad thought I should have access to those things. I can't imagine why. It wasn't fun for them, I was four, and I don't remember it being fun for me, what could I possibly gain from revisiting that meltdown? Tips on destroying another person? No, that's not part of the "Friendly" playbook. Their playbook was something else. If Henry the Eighth wrote a divorce playbook, he slipped them a copy.
No, we don't go into their divorce. It wasn't pretty, I know that. I also know that Dad had "alone" issues too. Hereditary? I don't know; he's not nearly as social dependant as I am.
There's a girl at work. We've known each other for over 4 years, and email back and forth the obligatory "Hi how are you," about once a month, followed by the obligatory "I'm fine" a week later. I didn't find out until recently, but she went through a divorce about the time she started with the company. She's since remarried, and seems to have a great marriage, a good life. The pictures all look happy anyway. Of course who sends "I hate you" pictures? Brides cursing at husbands. Husbands, glazed eyed, staring into the TV searching for solace in a Cubs' Game. Oh, don't get me wrong. I know that picture has a negative; Guys going nutty over somesuch. we just burn the film before it develops into something we can't deny.
My friend was saying that she had the same problem as I do. She'd just moved to a new community, didn't know anyone, and was working at home. Her email said, "That's how I became addicted to email. Haha." Even her text laugh sounded stilted, like putting it on paper might recast some voodoo curse, forcing her to relive the life she didn't want to remember.
I can understand that. I can't see a lot going on now that I'm real excited about. Oh, I'm sure in two or three years I'll look back and say, "Yeah, but without that, I wouldn't _____ ." Problem is, this side of the ______ looks like an endless chasm, with no bridge in sight.
I'm not trying to sound depressed. I know I'll make it across. Even if I have to suspend my palm wielding servants across the abyss, wrists tied together, a makeshift rope bridge, I'll do it, kicking and screaming all the way (That would be their kicks and screams, not mine. Seems they don't like hanging over a gap while somebody walks across them. Some people just don't appreciate what they have.). Hearing my friend's story did help. It's one thing to know that other people have been there, but it helps to know the other people who've been there. To see pictures with a little brass plate: "Survivor," and to be able to point and say "I know her! She does my job. She survived. I can too!"
I am still worried about this coming season. I have a vacation starting the 14th. It was supposed to be my anniversary vacation, but I don't think I'm celebrating that any more. I don't know what I'm doing instead. Work helps keep me focused. Without it…I don't know. Then there's Thanksgiving and Christmas--Yeah, I think I'll dwell on the vacation for now. Somebody bring me a mint julep; This is gonna take some thought.
5 comments:
Heat snap sounded good to me, but when you questioned yourself, I started to question you as well. I think most people call it a heat wave. But are you like most people? I didn't think so.
LOL! Ok...I'm not sure if I've been insulted or complimented. "Not like most people." One side says, "individual, unique." Flip that coin over and it says, "Odd, peculiar."
"Abby someone..."
And you know what? I think you MEANT it to sound vague! I also like how you questioned me, and not yourself for the heat snap sounding good. I'd be horrified if I weren't impressed.
As for the heatwave. that's the swelter in progress. I mean it more like once it ends, like a fever breaking. Cold snap, now that I think about it, that's an "in progress" too. What's the end of a cold snap? a break? In a relationship, people could argue, that the break IS preceded by a cold snap. In weather though? People in the Midwest and outdoor dogs probably just call it a blessing...
Well, I just had to research a word for what you are looking for. This is what I came up with from a MSNBC article:
The Northeast got some heat relief Wednesday from the heat wave sizzling much of the nation....
Heat relief? I can't say that's very creative.
BTW, I think you pre-read my mind.
As I was reading the first paragraph, I thought to myself, "I meant to be vague, I wanted to see whether you would interpret that to be a positive or negative comment."
One more.
Google the end of a heat wave, and at the end of the first page,
"When the heat wave broke a week later, ..."
You were on the right track with the fever thing.
I do realize how pathetic I am in this quest for the words.
"heat relief?" Is that like Robin Williams and Whoopie Goldberg making jokes until the weather subsides?
THen there's the "relief pitcher." who comes in to take over for the old one. So is that more heat coming back in?
I dunno.
Oh, and to show you pathetic, I actually did Google "the end of a heat wave" (although it sounds kind of like a bad joke: "What do you get when you google the end of a heat wave? Yeah,I don't even have a bad punch line to match.) My last story on page 1 is different than yours. Mine is an on going HEAT WAVE in Europe, with no END in sight. No help.
I think your story is playing off the whole "wave breaking" thing.
If I go to the Thesaurus, I find the heat wave disturbed, routed, froze in it's tracks, or took a time out.
Not much help there, but I do appreciate that it "Froze in it's tracks" I could use that.
The vague thing? I'm a hopeless optimist with realistic tendencies. I see the glass as "not a half bad way to hold what water I'm getting."
And I was willing to give you "bored" over "pathetic" in your word search, but I do enjoy your diligence. So don't say you're pathetic. May I recommend: Piteous, heartrending, dismal, lexically ravenous, persistently blessed... ;)
Me? I'm hopelessly distracted.
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