Writing Your Story

Delete! Delete! Delete!

That's how my day started. I hate computers! No not because they're belligerent tools fighting against their assigned lot in life. Hell, that describes me half the time. Why would I rail against that?

¡Viva la revolución!

No my computer hatred is far more visceral. I hate that I can't grab bad prose, rip it out by the roots, crumple it into a ball, and hurl it across the room in disgust. No, any kind of childish tantrum I throw, costs money: Keyboards, monitors, mice. Computers fall apart if you just tap them with the slightest disdain. When it comes to computers, things break. They're more delicate than Rob is a prom dress.

Yeah, I know that leaves plenty of room for "delicacy." It also leaves some nasty retinal burns. I wouldn't close your eyes anytime real soon.

See, everyday I work on perfecting my blog and everyday I spend more time stroking the delete key more than anything else. I guess in certain circles that's a good thing. In perfectionist circles it's a weakness. I may not know much, but I know my people, and they're a sacrificial pyre type lot. Each log measured for precise length and girth, and stacked evenly and precise quantity. When the fire starts, we need to wait for optimal temperature for exact scalding, without chaffing. We're never invited to inquisition parties or witch burnings.

"At this rate we'll never get to the s'mores! Burn him already!"

This morning I started a blog and before I was three paragraphs in I'm hammering the delete key. Nothing's good! Some days finding the words is like shaving my cat with a blender. It's never precise, and the cat is never the same. Something's wrong with his mew.

Ok, you cat people. I didn't do anything. I'm sure even MyEx is holding a doll before the kitties now, "Show me how the bad man touched you!"

It was purely an untested metaphor. I swear. Most of my stuff is untested. Are you kidding? I have to live vicariously through my readers. Do you know how tough that is for a writer? I write what you live so that you can read about it. Clearly we're confused by the direction of our Narcissistic relationship.

Still, sometimes it's good to sit on the sidelines. I just got done with a tough experience. I'm healing now. Maybe it's best if I live through those around me. Maybe I can learn from all our mistakes and make this the best blog ever!

Ok, well maybe not but I can at least make it a little better. In the meantime….

Delete! Delete! Delete!